OFFICE of Dr AB

[baviary]

Mr Hillcreast you are now of great concern to me, and this has been confirmed to me by BP & PP.
Only 80 birds you say, well by my calculations if you have reduced them by (X) Amount then that takes you to a total of this amount (X), now further to this if these are nesting and at a rate of 4 to 5 then you will end up with a grand total of....." WHAT" !!!! .......that's way too many, that's shocking. I think this moon watching is working to well for you and is disastrous to your health. What I will prescribe for you is that next time you sit out side watching the moon, try laying on the ground with your legs in the air and balance a bucket of water on your feet, I would also like you to repeat this wording over and over.....

Hey diddle diddle....Frank and his fiddle
The tiels flew over the moon....The good wife Laughed
to see such sport.......when the bucket fell over the loon

please try this for one week and I'm sure even your neighbours will help try to cure you as well,
if not I can arrange a new course of medication or maybe a session in the "Special Room"

Regards
Dr Aviary

[baviary]

Ms Pollyparrot

"Less addicted" you say, well that's not what I was told by a MR BillsPets, he has said that you are the one that started all of this, in fact he says you have a favorite saying "" just do it, no one will know"".....oh dear me, ....this is distressing for I believe you are beyond any help, but I am willing to help you.
Now as for this PetBarn problem, and the forced of evil you mentioned,....these are just all temptations for you, you must be strong, next time you hear someone say " can I help you " in one of these Pet Shops I want you to flap your arms like wings and then start making noises like a chook. I am sure this will work for you as they will boot you so fast out the door that you will thank me for it. Please let me know how you go Ms Polly ASAP as I think this would be an excellent prescription for Mr AussieBirds but don't tell him that.

Regards
Dr Aviary

[baviary]

Mr Billpets

Pointing the finger again, this is another clear sign of discernment for me, your delusions go beyond psychological and I have taken great notice to the fact that you're always pointing at Ms Pollyparrot and Mr Hillcreast, these poor two will be spending time in the "Special Room" very soon and at the rate your going, you are proceeding at it will be a happy trio. Now one thing that may help you is for you to change your address, may I make the suggestion that you change it from what it is to billspinkfluffyslipper69 and also it will have a calming affect on others around you as well. Also for a remady, take to wearing pink slippers and if you can find some pink bunnies ears and twitch your nose every time someone mentions the word "Birds" or "Aviary"..... its amazing how laughter will cure anything. Please try this for three days and let me know how it worked.

Regards
Dr Aviary

PS Thanks for the offer of assistance, but my in box is now overflowing with applications of 2IC
and I'm sorry Mr AussieBirds but just because your the forum owner doesn't give you brownie points either

[baviary]

Motherhen
With your problem I must know of any purchases or acquisitions that you have made in the last week or even better the last month, if you feel you can not come clean with me than a short visit to the "Special Room" is now marked in your file for attention, and mind if you are worried about confined enclosure or being on your own than you will have company with Chickabee...last time I looked on her she was in there trying to unpick the buckles with her teeth and what a wild look she had in her eyes...(hmmm i must make a note that this wild look comes out in all avian accumulation patients) if you feel that a private session is more advantageous to you than you are welcome to PM me with your admissions...but then again two Caps can get on very well together.....I will re think my actions on what response I hear from you.

Regards
Dr Aviary

[baviary]

Ms Ollie

Its the quiet ones like you that I take special interest in, and as for you flying under my radar, sorry but I have an inside informant (PM me and I'll tell you who it is). I have deduced that you are trying to play "hide and seek" as this informant has been saying "ollie ollie oxenfree" so its not going to work Ms Ollie.
I have been reading through the lines....and you say you have four empty aviaries...and....tell me...have you lined up some acquisitions...
or can any one here reading this post throw light on what Ms Ollie is up too please. (yes dobbing is okay with me)(Polly your in with Ollie, feel like dobbing and I'll let you off the hook a bit) I will wait for more information (dobbers) before I can give you a course of treatment...(Maybe I could try Ollie with a......no...no...have to think about that one)

Regards
Dr Aviary

[baviary]

Lovemytiels

Oh dear another looney here, you really should not be listening to Mr Hillcrest, you know he is quiet barking mad. I was told that on some full moons he sings to his tiels I truly hope you don't do this as well. Now another little birdie has whispered to me that your the one that has so many birds you have lost count, I can see by your last post here that that is evident, you really do not know what you have do you, such a shame being confused, I will have to send you straight to the "special room" ( no think that's not a great idea Chickabee has gnawed threw two jackets, might be best to let her out, I think she has seen the error of her ways )...."no" I have changed my decision......you will go out and do a count for me on all of your birds...then I will work out a remedy for your avian affliction.

Regards
Dr Aviary

[baviary]

Well Chickabee..have you seen the error of your ways...can you walk past a petshop now....hmmmmm,
or do you still have some confessing to do to me, you have been very quiet the last few days....are you avoiding me too,
come on you can talk to me I don't bite...honest injin.

Regards
Dr Aviary

[ollie]

Innocent completely innocent!!!! .

[billspets]

i agree with Ollie here
WE ARE INNOCENT ARNT WE OLLIE

it is pollies fault
regards
bill

[chickabee]

quiet...geeezzz ...no wonder I'm quiet...I just chewed through two jackets Doc. burrrrp

[lovemytiels]

Honest injun, Doc, I really don't have that many birds. I was a good girl & went out to count my birdies, but bugger me the sun was in my eyes & I just couldn't see properly . No I certainly don't sing to me tiels, I would drive the poor things bonkers with my voice. I play music instead to get them in the mood by moonlight LOL, a bit of Dean Martin, Frank Sinatra
Oh no not the SPECIAL ROOM anything but that. Do all the new baby tiels count, Nah. Just because I am getting a new aviary on the weekend certainly doesn't mean I will be getting new birds. There I feel better now knowing I have come clean NOT LOL ;D ;D ;D. Cheers Anna

[hillcresttiels]

You reckon you got problems I'm laying here with my legs in the air trying to balance a bucket of water on my feet whilst my neighbour is shouting out obscene gesture to me as to where to to stick my bucket and the bloomin moon which has now got me into all sorts of strife has gone hiding behind this crap Melbourne weather we are having at the moment! hmmm gosh i think the Doc might be right 8 breeders x 4-6 babies each multiplied by 2-3 clutches now thats 70-80 chicks! crikey better extend the aviaries again maybe i can cut the corner off the lounge room and utilise that space hmmm So thanks for the prescription Doc I feel better alreadysucked him/her in cheers

Frank ;D

[Smiley]

Special room sound like fun ;D I just can see it now. Us two Capricorn’s getting together. The ideas or scandals we would come up with. Do you really think it would be wise to let us two go wild in there

[billspets]

hello all
well i have been sitting here and well i think the poor doctor how shal i say seems to be diagniosing all of us as having a problem but one must ask what attracted the good doctor to our great forum could it be that the good doctor is a bird love or even a birdahiolic ???and is using here status as a good doctor and trying to help others as a front to find some good excuses to feed her one habbit i think there needs to be a big investorgation into the good doctor what do we all think so i think the good doctor should come clean and inform all us so called addics what is her personal relasionship (obsesion ) with birds is
oh and by the way DR i dont think i have a problem and to prove it i am going to the petshop tommorow and i will take the wife and i will not buy any new birds i will get the wife to buy them my birthday is coming up come to that i will come out of the petshop emptie handed i will get the wife to carry it all just to show you that i have my ADDICTION under control
regards
bill

[fischer]

PHEEEEW. Looks like the Dr forgot about me ;D ;D ;D

[AussieBirds]

I completely concur with your analysis of the situation William, the good Doctor is a scam artist and is trying to hide behind her facade of an avian medical person when in real life she is a birdaholic. I have been doing a lot of investigation as to the identity of the good doctor and i am very close to revealing her identity and her secrete addiction. I have to reveal that the good doctor has approached me via PM at the forum accusing me of having certain demons regarding my birds when we all know I am completely Innocent and void of any afflictionI may have thrown them off the scent here I repeat I am strong, I am invincible, I am man I do not have an addictionif that doesn't throw them off the scent nothing will, hang on I have to go I have an appointment at the local bird shop to pick up those extra cockatiels

John

[pollyparrot]

ummm yes why did the dr forget about fischer mabe fischer is actually the dr ??
and the dr is rather easy on john thats another strange one hmmmm??
ok dr i went to the pet barn and i tried what u said you know flapping the wings ect honest i did and what happened ? well they put a net over my head and stuck me in a cage with some nice birdies:) i made some birdie friends and intend to follow up our friendship will be seeing more of them very soon:)
by the way dr ? that SPECIAL ROOM wouldnt happen to have a few birds in it for me would it ? just thought i d ask
yours sincerely completely misunderstood polly
ps i am no dobber but you got to watch ollie shes got a big enough yard for hundreds of birds ;D

[ollie]

I might have a big yard but don't forget there's a big pool, an even bigger shed (big enough for heaps of aviaries) but i'm going away remember so I'm not buying any birds.Mmmmm maybe my sister wouldn't mind looking after a few more.

[lin]

As a new member, I can assure you I do not have an addiction! Whilst a few weeks ago I admit I had birds in quarantine all throughout my house, kitchen, laundry, lounge and dining room, I have now only got my 4 house birds in the house. See proof of my lack of addiction. I know I have just finished another aviary, making 4 in the yard, and have started on another, with plans for a sixth, but I am purely doing this to fill the blank spots in the garden. I'm sure no one on here, especially the good doctor, would like to see me with empty spots in my garden? Yes, they are all rather large aviaries, but they are all rather large blank spots (well they were once I moved the plants), and of course you can't have half empty aviaries, so that is the only reason I am breeding.
Of course my last purchases of birds was not an addiction. I had a male canary without a girlfriend, but twice bought males in error, Of course I then had to buy 3 females, because you can't have boys without girls now can you? Full proof of my lack of addiction!

[billspets]

hello Lin
well i must admit i have now got some new excuses for building new cages and no use having a cage without birds so i will have to get some more birds
regards
bill
P.S now what birds do i want to buy this time