Post by vankarhi on Jan 27, 2006 13:20:03 GMT 10
This cracked me up. I couldn't stop laughing when i was telling my teenage kids. ;D 
Hope you guys enjoy.
Once there lived a woman who had a maddening passion for baked
>beans.
>She loved them but unfortunately, they had always had a very
>embarrassing and somewhat lively reaction to her.
> Then one day she met a man and fell in love.
>When it became apparent that they would marry she thought to
>herself, "He is such a sweet and gentle man, he would never go for
>this carrying on."
>She made the supreme sacrifice and gave up beans. Some months
>later her car broke down on the way home from work.
>Since she lived in the country
>she called her husband and told him
>that she would be late because she had to walk home.
>On her way, she passed a small diner and the odour of the baked
>beans was more than she could stand.
>Since she still had miles to walk, she figured that she would walk
>off any ill effects by the time she reached home.
>So, she stopped at the diner and before she knew it, she had
>consumed three large orders of baked beans.
>All the way home she putt-putted, and upon arriving home she felt
>reasonably sure she could control it.
>Her husband seemed excited to see her and exclaimed delightedly,
>"Darling, I have a surprise for dinner tonight."
>He then blindfolded her and led her to her chair at the table.
>She seated herself and just as he was about to remove the
>blindfold from his wife, the
>telephone rang.
>He made her promise not to touch the blindfold until he returned.
>He then went to answer the telephone.
>The baked beans she had consumed were still affecting her and the
>pressure was becoming almost unbearable, so while her husband was
>out of the room she seized the opportunity, shifted her weight to
>one leg and let it go.
>It was not only loud, but it smelled like a fertilizer truck
>running over a skunk in front of pulpwood mill.
>She took her napkin and fanned the air around her vigorously.
>Then, she shifted to the other cheek and ripped three more, which
>reminded her of cooked cabbage.
>Keeping her ears tuned to the conversation in the other room, she
>went on like this for another ten minutes.
>When the telephone farewells signalled the end of her freedom, she
>fanned the air
>a few more times with her napkin, placed it on her
>lap and folded her hands upon it, smiling contentedly to herself.
>She was the picture of innocence when her husband returned,
>apologizing for taking so long, he asked her if she peeked, and she
>assured him that she had not.
>At this point, he removed the blindfold, and she was surprised!!!
>
>There were twelve dinner guests seated around the table to wish her
>a "Happy Birthday"!!!
;D ;D ;D
;D ;D
Hope you guys enjoy.Once there lived a woman who had a maddening passion for baked
>beans.
>She loved them but unfortunately, they had always had a very
>embarrassing and somewhat lively reaction to her.
> Then one day she met a man and fell in love.
>When it became apparent that they would marry she thought to
>herself, "He is such a sweet and gentle man, he would never go for
>this carrying on."
>She made the supreme sacrifice and gave up beans. Some months
>later her car broke down on the way home from work.
>Since she lived in the country
>she called her husband and told him
>that she would be late because she had to walk home.
>On her way, she passed a small diner and the odour of the baked
>beans was more than she could stand.
>Since she still had miles to walk, she figured that she would walk
>off any ill effects by the time she reached home.
>So, she stopped at the diner and before she knew it, she had
>consumed three large orders of baked beans.
>All the way home she putt-putted, and upon arriving home she felt
>reasonably sure she could control it.
>Her husband seemed excited to see her and exclaimed delightedly,
>"Darling, I have a surprise for dinner tonight."
>He then blindfolded her and led her to her chair at the table.
>She seated herself and just as he was about to remove the
>blindfold from his wife, the
>telephone rang.
>He made her promise not to touch the blindfold until he returned.
>He then went to answer the telephone.
>The baked beans she had consumed were still affecting her and the
>pressure was becoming almost unbearable, so while her husband was
>out of the room she seized the opportunity, shifted her weight to
>one leg and let it go.
>It was not only loud, but it smelled like a fertilizer truck
>running over a skunk in front of pulpwood mill.
>She took her napkin and fanned the air around her vigorously.
>Then, she shifted to the other cheek and ripped three more, which
>reminded her of cooked cabbage.
>Keeping her ears tuned to the conversation in the other room, she
>went on like this for another ten minutes.
>When the telephone farewells signalled the end of her freedom, she
>fanned the air
>a few more times with her napkin, placed it on her
>lap and folded her hands upon it, smiling contentedly to herself.
>She was the picture of innocence when her husband returned,
>apologizing for taking so long, he asked her if she peeked, and she
>assured him that she had not.
>At this point, he removed the blindfold, and she was surprised!!!
>
>There were twelve dinner guests seated around the table to wish her
>a "Happy Birthday"!!!
;D ;D ;D
;D ;D 
